Rabble rabble rabble

Hey!
I have been pretty slack with my blog and with my book.
I have not completed the last dare.
Most of it i can blame on the wedding coming up in two weeks and all the homework i am trying to get done before hand.
Really, I'm writing just to write.
I have missed it.
So i think I'm going to just ramble to get it out.
Lately me and Jason have been fighting A LOT.
Its really stressing me out.
I started driving my brother's car and i thought that was going to help, since before that we had to go everywhere together.
It helped at first, but now its back to fighting.
It makes me wonder if me not reading my book and making the efforts i was is effecting things.
I'm not as positive as i was.
Mostly I'm stressed over everything.
I'm scared i wont finish everything in time for the wedding, I'm scared that the wedding wont be what i have planned it to be. I'm scared we will fight on our wedding day. I'm scared of getting married while we are doing all this fighting.
I'm scared of failure.
I wonder are these normal feelings that everyone feels before they get married?
I have been praying and praying on it but I feel like I have not gotten an answer.
and even that scares me!
Oh and to top all of it off, Jason saw me in my wedding dress.
He had been at the gym and I didn't know what time he was coming home. I was in the living room, having it penned at the bottom so it could be hemmed up and he walked in and walked right back out.
I know its silly, but i wonder is that a sign?
I'm probably being too superstitious about it, but after everyone left, I cried.
Then i felt stupid, but i couldn't help it.
He's not supposed to see me until the wedding day, so that when i come down the isle i take his breath away. I feel like that moment will not be there anymore.
Maybe I'm being silly and looking for a fairy tale that doesn't exist. but every girl still dreams about it.
Well i have rambled enough.
I will continue to pray and hope God has a plan for me that i just cant see yet.
until next time
Kim